For as long as I can remember, I’ve hated mothers day. I’ve seen it as a just another occasion when capitalism tries to guilt me into spending money for no reason. Fortunately for my family relationships this view comes originally from my own mother, who has a fairly strong aversion to spending money unnecessarily.
Most of the people who know me assumed that I would change my mind once I was a mother myself. And I have softened a bit. The card I got from Hungry Boy this morning that he made at school, with “I love you” written prominently in three places, was pretty nice. But the completely useless (about A7 size, if there is such a thing) notebook and pen that he bought me from the mothers’ day stall at school with the $5 that Mr Penguin had given him didn’t warm any cockles that I noticed.
I was reminded of a rant from Penelope Trunk (not about mothers’ day, about take your child to work day):
This holiday now strikes me as one similar to Secretaries Day, which is a relic from the days when there were no computers and secretaries had thankless jobs and the men who were having sex with them on the side always forgot to thank her in the spotlight for the typing, so there is an official reminder day to buy her a card. That made sense. Twenty years ago.
The reason mothers day is still such a big day is that motherhood is not valued for the rest of the year. Apart from the desperate urge to sell something, anything, to mothers that permeates advertising at this time of year, mothers day helps everyone else feel less guilty about how little mothers are valued for the other 364 days of the year.
I’m looking forward to when mothers day has paled into insignificance because mothering is valued every day of the year.
Wow. Pretty cynical. Try joy instead!
Careful. Mother’s Day can make you crazy.
See:
http://notionscapital.wordpress.com/2009/05/07/the-story-of-mothers-day/
I absolutely agree and I’m so glad you’ve said it. I also have no time for Valentines Day. I do not like forced, mass displays of sentiment especially not when they are really just a vehicle for selling things.
Sorry, but I like Mother’s Day (and Father’s Day too). Of course we all love our mothers and we should appreciate them all year round. But when someone is part of your life all the time, looking out for you all the time, it is easy to become complacent, to just accept it as part of life. Mother’s day serves as a reminder that what mums do is wonderful and that it should be appreciated and celebrated.
Sure, the gift buying is tacky, and forcibly consumerist. That, however, is the same for all holidays in the world we live in. You have to look past that and make the day what it should be.
Here’s an analogy. I’m not a Christian but Christians don’t appreciate Christ only at Easter and Christmas, they do it all year round. The holidays are there to serve as a celebration. So, appreciate your mother all year round but celebrate her on Mother’s day.
Valentine’s day is another matter though.
[...] The End of Mothers Day [...]
My mother was a bit like your mother re: mother’s day, and I always thought it had something to do with Presbyterianism.
I’ve given up on Mother’s Day. Mostly because I never get any presents on Father’s Day, admittedly. Actually, it’s more to do with the whole “holidays invented by the Victorian greetings card industry” air about it. And how authentic can it be if it takes place on different days in different countries? Valentines Day is unquestionably worse, however.
… I’m with you. Mother’s Day is a complete crock. Pardon my cynicism but I think it is souped up for commercial stimulus reasons and perpetrated by Anglo Saxon guilt.
I try to teach ‘oboegirl’ to show respect and love for her mum and dad everyday.